Published by Oi Polloi of Cottonopolis


One Time


This movie madhead used to spend most of his days with the curtains drawn, working his way through cult VHS classics. It all got a bit much during his ‘70s NYC’ phase though — he found himself walking the mean streets of Breightmet with a baseball bat, causing a right old ruck. A life of crime can be flash and exotic, but sooner or later you need to put down the ‘Glock 9’ and get on the straight and narrow. 

As a means of reform, One Time Warrior now coaches a primary school rounders team. When his old mates call: “Warrior, come out to plaaaay-ay”, his sulky response is: “Can’t — sports day tomorrow”.

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